…whether I do or not.
I must apologize for my lack of anything blog related over the last couple of weeks… I have fallen way behind on my book reviews, and that is annoying. But don’t worry! I am going to catch up. And… maybe I will even write something not review related.
Anyway, keep an eye out. I think I’m about back to full-speed again. I need to not be depressed for a long while; it does not suit my personality. This I know.
Wish me luck!
Mary Roach’s Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers was absolutely the grossest book to which I have ever listened, and probably the book from which I’ve learned the most. I will not lie. I loved this book. Capital “L” love. I am not even kidding. I would listen to it a hundred times. I know what you are thinking. How could on possibly love a book about dead bodies? Dead freaking bodies?
The truth is that Mary Roach uses her dry wit to break up the almost unbearably disgusting sections of her book. It is a great combination. Believe me, almost unbearably disgusting is a perfect way to describe when Roach describes human dissection or decay or even preservation. There were times when I found myself literally saying, “Gross gross gross eww bleck gross,” while listening to a particularly disgusting section. Humans love to learn about themselves, and gross things so when the gross thing is a human (or rather, was) one cannot resist. I couldn’t.
Shelly Frasier performed wonderfully; however, in the earlier chapters of the book, I noticed that there were quite a number of places where the audio had been spliced together. I wonder if Frasier needed breaks in able to read such dark content in such a light-hearted manner. That is pure speculation, but I would not be surprised if it were true.
This may be the one and only non-fiction book that I wouldn’t mind reading, or listening to, again. I can’t wait to read Roach’s other books. She makes learning a blast. (I’m sure the subject matter helped. I know everyone, even if they swear that it’s too morbid, wants to know about dead bodies. It’s like learning swear words when you’re a kid, it’s taboo, but you want to anyway.)
If you’ve ever thought your family crazy or yourself crazy, or if you or your family is crazy, or if you are simply interested in crazy people and families, Carrie Fisher’s Wishful Drinking is absolutely the book for you. I would know because absolutely fall under some of those categories.
I won’t lie, I mostly wanted this audiobook, so Princess Leia would talk to me for 3 hours. I know I am a ridiculous Star Wars geek. A ridiculous Star Wars geek with an interest in insanity. I am the market for this book. However, I must admit that it is clear in the first few minutes of the book that Carrie Fisher is not Princess Leia. She talks mostly of her childhood and what it was like to grow up in America’s spotlight.
Wishful Drinking is a hilarious celebrity memoir. Fisher’s self-depreciating humor is laugh out loud funny, and her antics rival Charlie Sheen. It is an interesting look into the life of a princess. I only wish I would have seen the roadshow.
While I prefer listening to audiobooks read by the author, I broke my own rule when I decided to listen to Scott Westerfeld’s “Leviathan.” Leviathan is an alternative, steampunk history about the beginnings of World War I. (I love alternate history novels. I spent 6 years of my life learning to be a historian. While historians, arguably, change and bend history to their will, one thing they aren’t allowed to do is change the facts to any great extent. I imagine that could be a big reason why I enjoy alternate history fiction.) This story revolves around the exploits of an Scottish Darwinist and an Austrian Clanker. Alan Cumming, a Scottish actor who has played roles requiring a German accent, was a perfect choice for the reading of this story.
In Leviathan, Westerfield is able to not only explain the complex reasons why Europe erupted into war in the Summer of 1914, but he also manages to take futuristic elements and weave them seamlessly into the already complex story. Sure, he changed some of the historic dates and personas and such for the sake of the story, but Leviathan is an alternate history, so that is entirely welcome. It is fun, especially for a reformed historian, to imagine the First World War being fought between fabricated beasts and hugely complex, mechanical walking machines. The Darwinists Allies and the Clanker Central Powers become uneasy allies and the plot twists and turns its way through that fateful summer.
Had I been reading this book in the traditional manner, I am positive I would have been unable to put it down. As a audiobook, I found myself driving slower just to be able to listen to more of it at once. (Not only is it a good read, it also saves gas!) There is only one problem with Leviathan, and that’s the fact that it’s the first of a trilogy. I’m ready to listen to the next!
The issue I had today lies with the Tire and Lube department (where I am currently waiting for my tires to be balanced and rotated). The gatekeeper of said department met me at the entrance, without even the courtesy of letting me get out of my car. (Mind you, I have brought my car to my secondary Wal-Mart. But in a perfect world, all departments would be connected and there would be no issues about what previous gatekeepers had explained.)
I politely asked for a balance and rotation as my car is sorely in need of both. The gatekeeper asked if I had their super perks free balance and rotation program, which I politely replied that I did as I handed her the paperwork the previous department had given me when they said, and I quote, "Since you've bought a tire with us you now have the Road Hazard warranty and the Lifetime Balance and Rotation."
The gatekeeper took one look at the paperwork and insisted that there was no warranty, and insisted that once I paid for a balance and rotation here, then, and only then would I have the lifetime balance and rotation. The only problem with that being I've already paid for a balance and rotation here before. (So not only do they not communicate with each other, they also don't communicate with themselves.) At the point, I became angry and got, dare I say, bitchy with the lady. I insisted that I Did have the correct warranty and that she should either look at her records or call the previous store. Then, I did something I'm sure was unheard of for her. I opened my glove box cum filing cabinet and pulled out all of the receipts I had ever gotten from having my wheels done at Wal-Mart and found the receipt from months ago when I got my tires done here. Much to her chagrin, I did, in fact, have the correct warranty. In her defense, she quickly apologized.
I suppose this is a warning to all who may partake in the great value of having your tires done at the world's favorite blue big-box chain. Be prepared for them to want to make you unnecessarily pay, and keep all your receipts. I won't stop coming here, but I will be ever diligent and no evil gatekeeper (who I'm sure takes classes in getting swindling poor souls) will get me to pay money they are not owed.
P.S. Dear Wal-Mart, while I appreciate the fact that you put disposable seat covers in before getting oil and tire gunk all over the interior of my car, can you please start disposing of them before I have to get back in it. It would be much appreciated.
Addendum: It took me exactly as long to write this as it did for them to finish my car. Almost exactly a half hour for those of you keeping score.
Sent from my iPod, Astronaut.
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